Life Can be Bitter;
Everyone Could Use a Little Sugar… One Man’s Journey from Homeless Youth to Filmmaker.
By Rotimi Rainwater, director
I am one of the lucky ones. I say this because I was once
homeless, and of all the youth who at one time or another experience
homelessness, unfortunately, there doesn't seem to be many success stories.
That’s not to say that my life is perfect, by any means. In fact, I still deal
with the struggles of everyday life. But I do deal with them under my own roof,
and in my own bed. I couldn't say that 20 years ago when, after being released
from the Navy to take care of my mother who was fighting cancer, I found myself
homeless in Orlando, Florida. Those nine months I spent on the street affected
me more than any other nine months in my life. When you're on the streets you
quickly learn what is truly important in life.
You quickly learn to not sweat the small stuff. That what’s important is
having a place to live, food to eat, and people who love you. And thank God, I’ve found all of those.
Life on the street isn’t exciting. It isn’t as sensationalized as many films
have made it. Life on the streets is
mundane, and lonely. No one wants to see
you on the streets. One of the most
painful feelings to ever experience is to look at someone who is looking right
through you. To know that to them, you
are invisible, and that they would rather you not exist. That’s why most youth
on the street huddle together. All
children, no matter what they’ve gone through, need to feel loved. Even if it
isn’t from their own family, youth will go to great lengths to find acceptance
from those around them. But as I said, life isn’t exciting on the street. My
time was spent hiding the fact I was homeless from my mother because she was
fighting her own battle against cancer. She didn’t need to worry about me. So I
spent my days lying to her while I was taking care of her. I’d tell her about
my non-existent job and how great things were going. I’d lie to her and tell
her I was out partying the night before so I could use the shower in her hospital
room. But the nights were lonely. Night is when I was alone, sleeping in my car.
After it got towed, I slept under the bridge at Lake Eola. When I was a kid I’d
go fishing there with my best friend, Mike. But it was more than a decade later
and most of my friends had left town, so I slept where I once played.
Since then, I've spent the past 20 years working my way up
in the film business until I finally got the opportunity to direct my first
feature film: “Sugar.” And it has been an amazing journey telling the story of
homeless youth in Venice Beach. I've spent the past two years of my life
fighting to get this story made, and now that part of the journey is over and I
have time to reflect. They say getting any film made is a miracle, and “Sugar”
is no different. Getting Hollywood to care about homeless youth, getting actors
to dive into the world to bring the authenticity needed, and finding the right
distributor who believes in the cause just as much as they do the film, have
all been miracles. But here I am. And
with my story, I hope to inspire others who have spent time on the street to
not only follow their dreams, but to not
be afraid to dream. And I also hope to give people a realistic view of what
it's like on the streets, to humanize the youth who've ended up homeless; because
no child on the streets is there by choice. No 13-year old watching Disney with
his or her parents wakes up one day and decides to leave home and go eat out of
a garbage can. Every child on the streets is a victim, and they need to be seen
as such. Every child on the street has
been hurt by the ones who were supposed to love them the most. Almost all of
them have been abused either physically or sexually, or persecuted for their
religious beliefs or sexual orientation to the point that for them, the streets
is all they have left. They all need our
help.
And that’s what I am trying to
do with this film. To be a voice for them, someone who has been there, someone
who can show youth you can pick yourself up, and someone to tell the rest of
the world to help. So please, help. Get
educated on this issue. Volunteer at your local youth shelter. Do something
to help end this tragedy. As the film says, "Life can be bitter, everyone
could use a little SUGAR."
You can also see this blog at: http://usich.gov/blog/rainwater
